Lark of Concrete Fields (Poetry Portrait)

He danced in a field of wild flowers,
took their memory across the sea
– long weeks away from home
(but the game went with him, even when he played on foreign shores)

There’s golden sunshine and the colour of rain-wet straw,
the lark in the meadow sings out to him,
and the song of a travelling bard
(and the songs play inside him, beckoning to follow)

A spring in his step and sparkling laughter in his eyes,
he dances for himself and fights for a better world,
miles to go and people to meet
(be it on green grass or grey pavement, both are his playground)

teach me in silence. (renga)

without any words
speak to me in clarity
guiding hands and gaze

as you move in eloquence
I’ll be your young reflection


Some things are learnt best by imitation. First I had to learn (and I’m still learning) the art of emulating complex movements and heeding tiny signals – a flick of the hand, a line drawn by a gaze, a quick wink or smile, a beckoning head-tilt. Watch, interpret, try, fail, try again. Eventually I became more fluid than I had ever dared to hope in this silent way of teaching more than what is conveyed in words. Still I can’t see everybody equally clearly, but some people are “visible” enough for me to be able to follow their lead in a way that makes me feel comfortable and safe. I’m always glad when I get to spend some time learning from one of them. Sometimes I wonder if these are people who used to be a little like me when they were younger.

Writing at Dawn (Haiku)

filling blank pages
I love to see the morning
from the other side


Tonight, just before dawn, it smells like spring outside and the first birds are singing in the dark. I wish I could go and sit on the roof. Just a few more days until I’ll be free to do more of these weird and beautiful things again. Maybe even go to capoeira class for five days in a row, just because I can do so. Tonight I’ll spend dawn filling in the blank spaces in my morphology chapter.

Consent: Not actually that complicated

Might be interesting to some of my followers :)

rockstar dinosaur pirate princess

A short one today as my life is currently very complicated and conspiring against my preference to spend all of my days working out what to blog. But do you know what isn’t complicated?


It’s been much discussed recently; what with college campuses bringing in Affirmative Consent rules, and with the film of the book that managed to make lack of consent look sexy raking it in at the box office. You may not know this, but in the UK we more or less have something similar to ‘affirmative consent’ already. It’s how Ched Evans was convicted while his co-defendant was not – and is along the lines of whether the defendant had a reasonable belief that the alleged victim consented. From the court documents it appears that while the jury felt that it was reasonable to believe that the victim had consented to intercourse with the co-defendant, it…

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master’s thesis update: one week to go

Just one more week until I have to prepare my master’s thesis for printing! Tonight I finished the contents of the chapter on the theoretical framework, just some examples and citations need a little more work. I’ll do that when my proofreaders say the content is okay and not full of logical wholes.

I’m quite content with another chapter, which is on special uses, metaphorical meanings and possible grammaticalisation. At the moment it’s longer than the chapters on the “normal” usage!

The biggest struggle is the statistics – I’m still not sure about more than half of the tags, so counting them is fuzzy business, and my first attempt of counting resulted in weird numbers that just didn’t add up when comparing the stats for the different aspects I’m looking into. Big drama last night. I’ll have to rework the categorisation, the tagging, and the stats before I’ll be able to write something decent on lexicalisation. And syntax. I hate describing fuzzy syntax stuff.

Morphology is mostly alright. So far I’ve refrained from working statistics into the morphology chapter; this will be reserved for the unlikely case of finishing the other things early enough. Putting affixes in categories and describing their use was quite nice for a change, though I’ll have to spend at least one more day on it to fill in all the examples and describe a few things more detailed.

Just so-so are the chapters on the data used, terminology, and inference. Inference is an interesting topic, but I lack the knowledge (and time) to research it in depth. The introduction is fairly solid, though the order could be better, and the outlook/conclusion will need some serious input in the end. Not sure about the troubleshooting chapter yet.

All in all I’ve more or less reached the absolute minimum of required pages; but this includes the still empty tables for these freaking stats. I’ll gain another page or two during the final formatting session by widening the side margins for my professors to write in their comments, but I’d rather be able to hand in at least the suggested 80 pages, the biggest tables not included in this figure.

In case you’ve made it so far through this bland post, thanks for reading, and please, send me some motivation, prayers, and maybe a few vegetables, I should stop living on sugary stuff.



rush-hour brain (haiku)

illegible days
a million thoughts rushing in
how to breathe out words?


Some days my brain is crawling with thoughts like ant rush-hour, and it can be such a chaos inside my little cosmos that I can’t form words or letters sometimes. I try to speak and mix up words, I try to write and all I manage are scrawly letters, half of them missing so I have to guess the words myself when rereading them later.